New Year's Prompts for Looking Back

Retrospective and/or Regression

Churchgoers wear 3D glasses, source unknown

I’ve been thinking about what it means to look back.

Historically I’ve claimed to be “anti-nostalgia,” undoubtedly a half-baked placeholder for investigating how I actually feel. A better way to explain it would probably be…aware of the slipperiness that comes from letting myself stew in what’s regressive or anecdotal. Or to borrow a line: An unwillingness to at times be on “nodding terms” with the unattractive bits of who I used to be (and/or perhaps still recognize).

Or: There’s a packet of very old gas station pistachios in my glove box—essentially a relic—that I sometimes will eat in a moment of desperation, or boredom, or both. I’m not saying I like them! But I’ll likely never throw the pack out until I sell the car and am forced to empty out all its chaotic compartments filled with crumpled napkins and pennies and gum wrappers and chopsticks because you never know. Anyway!

The pistachios to say, there are those things you use because they …